The hoopla over Janet Jackson’s exposing her breast on national TV, or Elvis’ gyrating, MJ’s crotch grabbing, or Adam Labert’s kiss are more indications that our country’s hypocrisy about sex is still very strong. Janet and Lambert’s actions were just the next logical step in our fascination with the extreme and with the use of sex to sell, this time themselves and their latest CD, and it worked. Many were appalled because, they said, children were watching. As if children, old enough to know, are not aware of all the subliminal and not so subliminal sex there is on TV, the Internet and, of all places, in magazines for children.
The worse abuse, though, is the denial of our own sexuality. While we are abhorred by Janet Jackson’s exposing a breast, pornography is a huge, multi-billion-dollar business just because we are in denial and are afraid to give our sexuality its rightful place in our lives. We are sexual beings, and that is good and wonderful, and we are blessed to be able to experience it in a fully conscious way. Perhaps, we are the only beings that can. Why are we so frightened of the pleasure our sexuality can give us? Science knows that the fetus masturbates. Most of us know through experience that young children play “doctor” and “show and tell.” Most importantly, science knows from painful experiments that mammals require touch to survive. We crave the touch of another, and we will go to great lengths to get it, because it is more important than any other element of survival.
While you would probably have advance notice of a fair fight, you won’t have a chance to prepare yourself for an attack situation. Be aware of your surroundings so that you are aware of imminent or potential attacks. Always be in the mindset of paying attention to potential dangers and what you can do about them. By looking for suspicious people or situations, you can mentally prepare yourself for a self defense situation before the confrontation itself. Paying attention to your surroundings is essential if you want advance warning or time to prepare yourself mentally to fight back.
While a fair fight would probably stop once one fighter is down, you cannot expect a violent situation to simply end. You must take your attacker down in order to escape such dangerous situations. Here, pepper spray and stun guns can be invaluable, giving you minutes to flee while your attacker is incapacitated. There is no referee to stop the attack, and there is no time limit; it is up to you to make your attacker physically unable to continue.
We, our society, are to blame for the life-long suffering of these children, not only because we program them about how terrible childhood abuse is, but because we have taken away from them the one ability they instinctively have that can save them from it. A child may be too young to know the difference between a leg, an arm, a butt, and a crotch, but there is a way for children to instinctively “know” if someone means them harm. That natural, instinctive knowledge is programmed out of most of them from birth, leaving them utterly defenseless. Then we blame, stigmatize the abused child. In some countries, young people are even put to death if they are raped. Do you remember seeing those horrible security tapes showing the teenage girl in Florida being meekly lead away to her death? How about clergy abuse, how does that happen? Those events did not have to happen, because there is a way to give that instinct back to children, and it will protect them very well. Child abuse prevention begins in the mind of the child, and I’m not talking about spreading more fear with stranger danger, but about giving them back their deepest, most inherent instincts that every mammal has, and that we have taken away from our children. It’s far worse than de-clawing our family cat and then putting it outside to fend for itself.
In a related article called Healing the Children, we’ll talk specifically about what this instinctive ability is, how it works, and how we can re-activate it in our children for their well being for the rest of their lives. Incidentally, all of us have this dormant instinct that can provide us with every personal answer we will ever need to create a life of abundance as we walk through our days
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